My daughter is 7 and is realizing the weight of fairness lately. Everything from wanting Mom & Dad to be off of our electronics at bed time because she has to get off of hers, to wanting us to read every night because she has to as part of her homework. Of course, I don’t follow her first request, but I thought that reading every night could be good for me. I made a reading log like she has, and I mark down the book I’ve read each night so that I can show her my progress. It has made me realize how much I miss reading, and how relaxing it can be. So day 8 of my 30 Days of Gratitude asks:
8. What book are you most grateful for?
A. This is a fairly easy question for me.
When I lost my mom, I looked to books to comfort me in my journey of grief and reflection. I didn’t want to feel alone, or misunderstood; I wanted to hear from others who had been in my exact situation. This search lead me to the book, ‘Motherless Daughters: The Legacy of Loss’ by Hope Edelman. As the title says, this is a book specifically for girls and women who have lost their mothers.
Photo credit: Amazon
I was 26 when my mom died; not a child, but barely a woman. I didn’t know many people who could relate to me. This book was filled with stories from women my age, and even led me to find a motherless daughters group online, which was incredibly helpful. When I finished reading ‘Motherless Daughters,’ I passed it on to my cousin, whose own mother had committed suicide only months before my own mom passed away. We never chatted about it, but I hope it brought her as much peace as it brought me.
Some other books that helped me during that time:
- Books about near-death experiences: Regardless of any faith I may have had before my mom died, I felt very concerned about where/how my mother was after she passed. Was she pain free? Was she okay? Was she scared? What did she experience? She was alone when she died, and I was supposed to visit her the day she was found, and I felt very guilty about that. She did not commit suicide, but her death was very sudden and unexpected, so naturally I worried about her. Stories of near-death experiences brought me comfort because people spoke of a feeling of such peace when they “died” and I wanted that peace for my mom. She had a difficult life in many ways, and I wanted that weight to be lifted from her.
- Stories of mothers sending signs from Heaven: I really loved the book, ‘Feathers Brush My Heart’ by Sinclair Browning. After Browning’s mother died, she began seeing white feathers, which she instinctively knew came from her mother as her mother used them as an actress in life for diaphragm lessons. My own mom used to believe that her mother visited her as a dove. Shortly after my mom died, a dove nested in a tree outside my living room window and had two babies, just as my mom had my brother and me.
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Are there any books that you feel grateful for? Any that have helped you through tough times, or inspired you in any way?